A story, my children

[jickletuice]

Once upon a time there was once a boy named Philipenis. He was never made fun of at school but his mum gave him odd looks every now and then. Phil, as we will call him, was a normal young boy who's ambition it was to become a writer, because he preferred erotica to porn as he thought it was a little more classy. So, Phil set out on a quest at the age of 6 to write a pornographic novel for children. He met many strange people on the way, including his grandad, which was strange, considering his mum said he went to live on a farm... weird.

There were three trainers in the noble art of pornography, Elizacunt Windsor, Marty McCock, and Fred Inyouranus. Phil had no time to actually take the time to talk to them all so he casually skyped them from his nan's kitchen. They taught him everything. He could now write pornographic novels... "What would I write though?" Phil said in his head, Shit, I'm a poet and I didn't know it.

So guys, decide what he should write!